3 days of SIEN-NESS

It has been 3 days. Gosh..imagine how's my life when I couldn't online. Without MSN messenger, without friendster, without blogger, without shows, without sites to browse for. Computer seem so useless if there isn't an internet connection. So, I've had 3 days of sien-ness. Doing nothing at home. =[

As usual, my mind went disorder again. I really cant be left alone without the computer or i should say a computer with internet connection. I thought about silly things again. I knew I shouldn't think about it. But, I just can't stop it.

Sometimes, I really wanna spill everything out to somebody. But when I was looking for somebody to talk to in my phone contact list, I realised that I've got nobody to talk to. How pathetic am I. Maybe I'm the one who have no faith in anybody. Seriously, after those incidents, do you think that I will have faith in anybody?? =[

There is nothing I can do in this case. Just leave it aside, I suppose. How good is it if all these matters that bother me are sort of gas particles?? Then I'll be able to compress them no matter how big volume is it. Miserable life..

*Pics taken last few days*

失去了自我。。

听完那段话，我的眼泪竟然情不自禁的流了下来。。
当时的我真的觉得自己很衰。。
我真的很没用吧。。
我的一举一动真的制造了你所有的伤痛吗？？
也许我根本不该存在。。
那这一切都不会发生了。。
很想说声对不起。。但你也不会懂。。
如果这世上有个能删除人类某部分记忆的机器，那你应该会买了它吧。。
然后删除一切关于我的记忆吧。。
这样，你会开心点吧。。
我真得不懂怎样才能化解这一切。。
我真的令你如此辛苦，如此伤心欲绝吗？？
现在的我变了？？还是你我都变了??
无论如何，我仍然想对你说声抱歉。。
是我造成你所有的悲伤。。
偶尔，我恨透了我自己。。
感到非常的难过。。
但还需要假装自己是开心的。。
这样的生活，我真的厌倦了~！！

对不起~！！

CuRReNtLY AdD!cT3d..

I've got no idea why am I addicted to the song ' I don't want to miss a thing ' by Aerosmith currently. Since last week, I'm already listening to this song again and again for like few thousands times. I used to love this song when I was a kid last time. And now, I seems to fall in love with this song again. It's really a nice song for me. ^^

Obviously, this song reminds me about the movie ' Armageddon ' [ dunno whether i spell it correctly or not ] . This movie was like a decade away already if I'm not wrong. I watched it many years ago. Of course, it was a fabulous movie for me at that time. Gosh, feel like watching this movie again. Gotta figure a way to do so. =]

Well, I'll attach the chorus part of the song here : -

i don't wanna close my eyes

i don't wanna fall asleep

'cause i'd miss u,baby

and i don't wanna miss a thing

'cause even when i dream of u

the sweetest dream will never do

i'd still miss u,baby

and i don't want to miss a thing.

Pictures Spamming..

*nice banner-work of d JOYIANS*

*my finger shud b like tis originally*

*it ended up like tat after d incident*

*the view of the whole palm*

*spot d difference after 4 days?*

*4th day after d incident*

UnLuCkY..

I'm really too lucky yesterday. My third finger on the right was injured. It's a long long sotry indeed about how it was injured. So, I guess, I'll just skip this part then. What I can see now is : the whole finger is purplish in colour and it's swollen. How pathetic am I..

As the injured finger is on the right hand, hence, i can't write like usual. Now my writing speed is merely the same as the speed of a tortoise. Now i need to spend at least 15 more minute or even more then that to copy a short article which I need only few minute last time. Sad case.. =[

And i can't bear the pain at all. Once I accidentally touched it or anything, the pain definitely kills me. Now i realise how hard is it to live like usual for those handicapped people. I'm really surprise with their ability to survive although they are facing some physical problems. We should really thank the god since we don't have to face those problems.

P.S : I hope that my injured finger can recover as soon as possible. =[
[ I'll upload my injured finger pictures soon ]

R@tTi3E~!!

We celebrated Cik Abby's wedding in the school today. Of course, it wasn't her wedding day yet. However, we celebrated it with her earlier as none of us are going 2 attend her wedding. At the same time, 2day is Min Yee's [ our beloved assistant monitor ] birthday too. So, we bought a present for Cik Abby n a cake for both of them. Although it wasn't fun enough to have it in the class, but we didn't have any other choice. We were given half an hour to settle all this only. By the way, it's better then nothing also. [ Pictures will be uploaded below ]

In addition, we dissected a rat today. I believed that this biology class was the best class ever. We had lots of fun indeed. It's undeniable that I felt kinda 'geli' at the first place. But not long after that, I got used to it and felt it's kinda fun to dissect it and observe its organ. Sounds like maniac huh me?? =]

Seriously, my group was the cleanest group of all if it's compared to the other groups. We were really good to our rat. Other groups cut out the organs one by one and done lots of stuff to it. And I seriously 'terpegun' with what Jaren's group done. I can't believe it myself either. They somehow skinned the rat, although it's not alive. When I saw that, I somehow pitied the rat. =P

By the way, our group's rat was a female rat. One of us, I forgot who, or maybe me myself cut its ovary along with its Fallopian tube out without realising. I know it's a bit cruel. But we DIDN'T mean to do so. And we believed that it has just taken its meal when it died. It's because its stomach was full of food. Although we wanna examine the brain of the rat, but we've got not enough time and it's skull was too hard. So, we failed to do so. Well, I guess that's all about this rat. Pictures will be uploaded also.

*The Cake*

*4 JOY*

*Shorter edi orhx me*

*Promoting rat??*

*4 of us b4 dissecting d rat*

*S3t, M3, KaReN, JiUnN HuAh*

S.H.E night~!!

Gosh, I'm so so happy right now. It's because I went to the S.H.E promo tour yesterday night. I really can't hide the excitement and happiness at all. I even 4got that I've got a tuition today morning. My parents said that S.H.E's arrival drives me crazy. =]

Of course, yesterday night was a splendid night. I won't forget about it forever. Although I went for many times of their promo tour already, but I'm still happy to see them face to face. 3 of them are really pretty and nice. Gosh..who can resist such a cool group?? 3 of them definitely rock my world. Can't imagine my life without their songs. Honestly, once I reached home yesterday night, I on their songs for the whole night. They are just too awesome.

I think it's really worth it to wait for couple of hours just to see them face to face. Although there's something that I felt kinda annoying happened throughout the whole event, I forgot about all these annoying matter once they appeared.

They even announced that they are having a concert in Malaysia this December. I really won't miss that concert. I'm looking forward to the concert already. 4 more months to go and I'll be able to see them once again with their splendid performances.

*Entrance ticket*

*Anthony- Guest*

*S.H.E*

*S.H.E again*

*S.H.E 's signature*

*S.H.E's 10th album*

伤心的一天~。。

我不想否认我这几天心情实在是很糟糕。。
当然，这主要是因为我病了吧。。
加上一连串不愉快的事情。。
我的心情也就更糟糕了。。
我也不想提这些令我伤心难过的事了。。
但我仍然想谢谢这几天陪伴我的朋友。。
你们最棒了。。
即使我多么的伤心，你们仍然愿意讲笑话逗我笑。。
令我的心情愉快些。。
你们从来没有对我不理不睬。。
永远都第一时间的关心我。。
你们对我的关怀，我永远都会铭记在心的。。
我相信，有了你们就够了吧。。
我也该学习满足了。。
世上不是没件事都如我所愿的。。
也许我渴望的更多。。但又何必强求呢？？
把它忘了不是更好吗？？
无法否认我珍惜你们对我的好。。
但同时我也害怕这份好意。。
如果我习惯了得到别人的关怀与爱护，我此不是更脆弱了吗？？
一旦某天你们都离我而去，我就谁都不是了。。
我不想戴着坚强的面具过我的人生。。
因为真实的我并不是。。
这一场病真的令我领悟到很多事情。。
原来一直以来挂在口边说我有多重要的人，竟然是在我最需要关怀时不在我身边的人。。
事实竟然是相反的。。
在我身边的竟是那些一直以来在我身边默默支持我的人。。
我真的应该感谢这些病毒。。
令我认清了所有。。
但病毒还是离我越远越好。。
我不想令担心我的人再添任何麻烦了。。
真是伤心的一周啊。。

SicK..=[

It is 1.42 p.m right now. Of course, for any usual Fridays, I should be at school. But, I'm here, at home, instead today. This is because I'm SICK =[ . I hate to be sick. I nearly got to VISIT the doctor just now. Luckily i persuaded my parents with all sort of reasons that came across my mind just now. So, i escaped from going to the clinic.

It is really boring to be at home. I've got nothing to do at all except from facing the computer and lying on my bed. Actually wanna read books, but kinda headache. So, I gave up tat choice. I think my fever and cough have recovered a bit right now. But my sore throat isn't OK at all. It better recover by this Sunday. Otherwise, i might not able to sing on Monday with all of you.

Well, while I browsed the web just now, i found a phrase that kinda suits with what I'm thinking for all this time. The phrase is uploaded above. I think it's kinda hard to see the words above. I'll retype them instead.

快乐与难过。。有谁又能够懂我呢？？
爱情！？。。界於珍惜。。与拥有之间~！

P.S : I bet Fishy Yu don't understand what the phrase means because he DOESN'T understand mandarin. =]

Belated Goodbye Card

All the pictures below are showing the card which we gave Mr. Yu, or well known as fishy yu in our class. Joyians know it better than anybody does about how this name actually created.

*Front page of the card*

*Spot our beatiful signatures??*

*Whose finger is that??*

P.S : Fishy, remember to take good care of the card. This must be the largest card you have ever received, isnt't it? We will definitely look for this card once we step inside your room. *evil laugh*

Karen's Nite~!!

The photos below are those photos that we took in Karen's house last Friday. Like what i mentioned two days ago, we had lots of fun indeed. Hope you all briefly understand our happiness that day through the photos. Nevertheless, we took those photos among ourselves only, not with the whole big group of humans.

*Us with the birthday girl??*

*Oopss..June and I got horns??*

*Joyians*

*All sort of poses*

Stop it..Please..

Honestly, I think I'm very free today. I've got nothing to do for the whole afternoon. So, my mind went disorder again. I started to think about everything which happened recently, and most of them are those that i don't want to face for all this time.

Everything comes across my mind without my control. I can't get them out of my mind, even for a second. I can't spill any of my problem to anybody. Therefore, I've to go through this all by myself. But for god's sake, I'm just a girl. I can't cope with all the problems at the same time.

Sometime, I wonder why am I dealing with all these?? I sort of found it out why just now. The main source of all the problems I'm facing is ME instead. I'm the one who caused all these. How good is it if I'm somebody who understands myself well enough. Unfortunately, I am NOT. That's why I'm suffering.

I hate to act as if I'm ok when everything is NOT ok. I hate to act as if I don't know what's happening when I know about it. I hate to do all these, but yet I'm repeating them everyday.
What's the matter with me?? I definitely need a guidance. =[

P.S : Yen, I think it's easier for you to understand now. Inform me if you still find it difficult to do so.

Bon Voyage..~!!

yday was michael's laz day in our skul ler..
at 1st v reali dunno how 2 hold tis farewell party 4 him..
coz v got ntg except 4 a card..
but who noes..miracle happened..
ms c.m lee willing 2 help us 2 buy when v tot tat it was impossible 2 hold tis party edi..
but of coz..v need dolores umbridge's permission la..
so 7 of us [ me, set, faith, au dry2, ky, kl n cy ] went 2 look 4 her..
surprisingly, after asking us a few q, she agreed n approved..
whootz..whootz..
mayb she was not tat bad after all..much better den d real umbridge lor..
hehex..
so, v spent d 2 periods of gkk having fun in d cls..
but honestly, d kalium+ferum+copper was 2 much 4 me..
me couldnt finish it at all..hahax
i blif jaren, june n jh [ d triple J ]s' table muz b in a mess..
coz lotz of us ate at their tables instead of ours..hahax
after tat, v went 2 celebrate karen's bday in her hse..
did ntg much there..juz played 4 awhile n oso b sienz there..
hehex..oh yea..there was 2 doggie in karen neighbour's hse..
i named 1 of dem michael...
reali ans us when v called it michael..
hahax...
n moz of dem drunk yday..
wat's d fun of drinkin all tis alcoholic drinks??
stupid larh..moz hate ppl drink all tis de ler..swt
n i reali had enough of it..
y cant i juz get rid of it??haiz..

如果再拥有一次机会，我会做同样的选择吗？？
偶尔，我真的有点讨厌自己。。
讨厌自己下不了决定。。
是我的错。。真的很抱歉。。
也许连时间也帮不了我做这残忍的决定。。
或许是我太不了解自己了吧。。
当我心淌血时，又会有谁懂呢？？

P.S : Fishy..if u ever c tis..thx 4 helping us yday..Sorry 4 making u in trouble oso..n get well soon la..since u helped us yday..hehex

NiC3 1 J.K.Rowling..

yday nite i finally managed 2 finish d laz 100 pages of the 7th book..
ok..i hv 2 confess..i stayed up kinda late 2 finish it..
but who cares??i cant stop myself from continue readin..
coz s v noe..d laz few chap supposed 2 b d climax wad..
if i dun finish it yday, i think i wont b able 2 sleep den..hahax
so let's c..d ending was kinda plain...
d story juz ended like tat...no doubt it was nice..
but i expected more from J.K.Rowling..
nvm ler..at least d ending was kinda satisfactory..
cant wait 2 watch d 6th n 7th movie..
dey will b reali nice instead if none of d important scenes r eliminated..
n well..like wat i guessed b4 tis..
snape is not an evil man..
instead i started 2 like tis character since yday nite..
he's reali a guy who willing 2 sacrifice 4 luv..
eventhough he was on Voldemort's side b4..
but he realised tat he's wrong once Voldemort wanna kill his loved one..
im reali glad tat he did this decision..
im sure he din regret doin all tis 4 her..hahax
wel..dun wanna tok more on tis edi..
but i'll definitely miz harry potter series..
there wont b any other books bout him edi..
but nvm..i can read n read ag..hahax
oh yea..i juz dunno y tis few days i felt tired 4 d whole day..
not energetic at all..
pls dun b sick ler..i hate MEDICINE~!!
but eventhough im sick, i wont c d doctor s well..
i'll recover myself, isnt it??
s long s i rest more n blah..so dun make me disappointed ya..
i have faith in my immune system...get rid of bacteria 4 me wor..
hehex...til here den..